Living Optimally

So – it’s been a week, and what a week it’s been. Yours truly has been knocked down by the flu. Not sure whether it was just the common flu or the H1N1 strain – but whatever it was, it definitely got me. Which brings me to this week’s topic: Living Optimally.

A dear friend of mine recently shared her new life mantra with me, and I love it. It’s “Be happy now.” What does that mean exactly? Well, my interpretation is that it means that she is making decisions based on that idea. For example: if there is a choice to make between two things (as many of us experience this holiday season), she might look at the options through the filter of what will support her mantra of being happy now. Living in the moment. Too often we feel obligated to accept all invitations. As such, social commitments sometimes become a chore or a task, rather than a celebration. Now – this isn’t to say that you have to turn people down, but it does put a different perspective on things. If you have two holiday parties to go to on the same night, then you have the power to make the decision to choose one or the other – or both! More importantly, however, you also have the power to CHOOSE how you are going to approach the evening. Will you look at it as an overwhelming commitment? Or will you look at it as an opportunity to celebrate relationships and enjoy the moment? It’s your choice. Be happy now.

But let’s take this back to my experience with the flu. Last week I told you about Dr. Darren and Dr. Tom’s work. A major part of their work incorporates the idea of The Five Basics for Optimal Health, which are: ‘The quantity, quality, and frequency of water, food, rest, exercise and owning one’s power.” Of course, this is nothing new to most of us – except for, possibly, the “owning one’s power” part. But that relates back to what I just said about choice. As for the other four pieces – well, they’re just common sense, aren’t they? Or are they? If they were that simple – the weight loss industry and health care industry wouldn’t be worth hundreds of billions of dollars. So, where’s the disconnect?

In my opinion, it’s that last piece: owning your power. Owning your power means making a decision. Just like my friend has done in deciding to “be happy now” – it’s the decisions that drive us either toward health and wellness, or dysfunction and disease. If we want a quick-fix solution to a life-long problem, that’s a choice. And it might mean spending the rest of your life searching for the solution – rather than choosing a long-term strategy. But what about when things like the flu epidemic take place? I considered myself to be fairly healthy with a strong immune system, but I still got knocked down. Why? Was it something I did? Could I have done something different? Was I living optimally before I got sick? The answer is no – to all of those questions. I was not living optimally, however, there was also nothing I did to cause it, and there was nothing I could have done differently to prevent it, because that’s in the past. Going forward, however, I can make different choices.

I can choose to drink better water, more often, in larger amounts. I can also choose to go to bed earlier, and sleep better – giving my body more opportunity for rest and restoration. Food and exercise will also play a role. By making a deliberate decision to incorporate more fruits and vegetables, as well as daily movement in any form, I will be providing my body with the best possible scenario to heal and become stronger. The best part is, by making these decisions I will be owning my own power. In a way, it’s both a catalyst and a happy side effect of living a healthier life. It’s cyclical, and it will fuel itself.

One more thing, though – a big part of owning my power is also making the choice not to shame myself (and feel guilt) if I should choose something defined as “less healthy.” Life is about moderation, and life is about choices. A bowl of ice cream or a side order of French fries is a choice – it’s also a choice to feel happy about it and enjoy it fully, or to feel guilt about it and remorse. THAT is truly owning your power. So, just as my friend has embraced her own power by creating a mantra by which she lives her life, so can you. Every morning you have a choice to make on how you will approach your day. And every night, when you are lying in bed about to fall asleep, you have the power to choose how you will look back on your day and your choices. It’s up to you. Once you begin owning your power, the rest will naturally start falling into place. Amazing. And it all begins with you….with your choices.

THree THings

Body – What do you choose to drink first thing when you wake up in the morning? Water or coffee? Which one is more consistent with living optimally? Coffee is fine, but when you wake up, your body has become more dehydrated overnight. A glass of water might wake you up faster than the caffeine would.

Mind – If you find yourself feeling guilt about something – it’s probably an old pattern of belief. Pause. Give yourself a break, and see if you can make a decision to think differently.

Spirit – Honoring yourself is the greatest gift. It will give you the strength to take the initial steps toward living optimally.

In Love and Light,

Martina

Infinite Love and Gratitude

This week I would like to share with you my experiences from a workshop/training I took this weekend. The workshop was called “Conscious Body-Conscious Mind” presented by Dr. Darren Weissman, based on his book, work and research. His book is called “The Power of Infinite Love & Gratitude: An Evolutionary Journey to Awakening Your Spirit” and the workshop was the first step in learning The LifeLine Technique™. Now, I have been working with Dr. Darren’s friend and colleague, Dr. Tom Bayne, for over five years. I knew exactly what the LifeLine was all about, but I had never read the book, nor had I thought about learning the technique myself. Then I signed up, at the last minute, for this workshop – and I’m very glad I did.

Let me back up. Dr. Darren’s work is based on the simple truth that we are all energy – that everything is energy. From there, he expands that truth to explore how energy – specifically “negative” thoughts or emotions – can impact us and manifest in our lives physically, causing illness or disease. Ok, that was a REALLY simplified explanation of what’s going on, but I wanted to try to break it down into something more easily digestible. So – where does that take us, and what does that mean?

It means that thoughts, emotions and our environment can make us sick. And if that can happen – then the reverse is also true. We can heal ourselves by changing those patterns. Or, rather, our body can heal itself and function optimally if we allow it to. How? By creating an environment of, and offering it, “infinite love and gratitude” from a place of presence and compassion. Wow. So, during these three days of intense study, work and learning – I realized that even though I had been working with this premise for about five years, on and off, I hadn’t really accepted it.

Almost every appointment I went to with Dr. Tom, I wanted “him” to fix “me.” Now, this isn’t to say that I didn’t grasp it on some level, nor is it to say that I haven’t done some amazing work with Dr. Tom, shifting energy and emotional patterns that I’ve held for a very long time. Because I have done both, and I am so much healthier, happier and stronger than I was five years ago. But participating in this workshop, learning the technique from the inside out (including the research and work behind it) has opened my mind to new possibilities for wellness. I am so grateful.

I also realize that my acceptance is not yet complete. I know that I am now open to the possibility of these truths more than ever before, but that I am going to go through this process in a manner that is congruent with who I am. So, for me, that means small bites – with the occasional large gulp. Regardless of the speed, those are still steps forward – and isn’t that what it’s all about? Figuring out what works for you, and then honoring that process? We can do anything we want. We can wake up each morning and make that choice. Some people like to dive into things completely – head first, and eyes closed. Others like to test the water, sit by it for a while, then maybe put their feet in. Eventually – it doesn’t matter which speed we choose, because as long as we are honoring ourselves, and making our decisions authentically, from a place of love and gratitude, we are doing exactly what we need – and we will make progress. If we do things that way, then there is a greater likelihood that we will consistently move forward, rather than taking two steps forward, then one back, then another forward, then two back, and on and on.

So – while I couldn’t possibly distill everything I learned this weekend into one weekly writing (and I wouldn’t want to), you can be sure that my heart and my mind are processing all of this new information and it will slowly seep into my life as it’s meant to. And I will continue moving forward on this journey of mine, sharing with you as I go, in order to better help you on your own path.

For now, the biggest piece I would like to share with you is this: offering yourself and others “infinite love and gratitude” from your heart can have a profound effect on your life. The world – the Universe – is infinite, and so are you. I offer each of you Infinite Love & Gratitude from my heart.

THree THings

Body – Do your best to love yourself everyday. This can simply be making a decision to increase your water intake – especially during the dry winter months. I know I am. Infinite Love & Gratitude to your beautiful body.

Mind – Do your best to honor yourself everyday. Authentically speak your truth from a place of love. Infinite Love & Gratitude to your amazing mind.

Spirit – Do your best to be yourself everyday. You are energy – you are pure love and light. Infinite Love & Gratitude to your magnificent spirit.

In Love and Light,

Martina

For more information on Dr. Darren Weissman or Dr. Tom Bayne – please visit their websites at: www.infiniteloveandgratitude.com and www.pbhealthcenter.com, respectively. You won't regret it :-) (Photos of Dr. Darren's book and Dr. Tom's lotus logo duplicated from their websites.)

Intentional Interactions

Last week I gave myself a gift. I took a mini-pilgrimage, of sorts, to Detroit. Detroit?!? Yes. Detroit. I went there because it was about 5 hours away, and it was the last stop on Amma’s North American tour. Who is Amma? Well, Amma is a living saint – though she hardly describes herself as such. She is also known as “the hugging saint” amongst her followers. In short, without labeling her – Amma is a gift. And she shares herself with the entire world. (www.amma.org)

Amma’s gift consists of love and compassion, expressed through a hug. That’s it. It’s the simplest, most profound, gift: a hug. Last week I touched on the importance of hugs and handshakes. Well, soon after writing that entry, I was off on my road trip to see Amma. And I’m not even sure that I had realized the depth of my own message, until I experienced one of Amma’s hugs. At first, it was nothing seemingly spectacular, and yet quietly it became everything all at once. Let me explain.

A hug is a hug – right? Wrong. You know it when you hug someone who doesn’t like to be hugged. Kind of like when you get a “dead fish” handshake. Well, there’s such a thing as a “dead fish” hug, too. The person isn’t entirely present with you. They’re hugging you out of obligation or some sense of societal code. They would rather be anywhere else than in that hug. Now, the reverse is true. When you hug someone who really means it – who feels it in their entire body – you know it. And you usually respond in kind.

This summer I had the opportunity to meet and work with a group of people who gave these types of hugs – and it was truly amazing. But there was one person in particular, Jack, whose hugs were more than just two humans sharing space and expressing themselves with kindness, love and compassion. His hugs transcended the human experience until your breath became synchronized, and you felt your souls meet and greet one another, all in a matter of a few seconds. I had never experienced something like that before. At first it took me out of my familiar zone, but by the second of such hugs, I found myself looking forward to seeing Jack again – just to get one of his amazing hugs! This is a person who touched my soul, and I can conjure up the feeling that hug created – the warmth, connectedness and love – anytime I want. What a gift.

With Amma, though the embrace is physically different, and (for me) didn’t have such an immediate affect as Jack’s hug did, I find myself reflecting on it still. It has a depth that I am only just beginning to experience. It was warm, full of light, compassion and love; and I will go so far as to say it was soul-altering. Amma’s gift is her presence, which stays with you long after she has let you go. How many people can you say that about in your life? Which brings me to my point:

When something as simple as a kind, loving and compassionate hug can alter your emotional psyche – can you imagine what else we are capable of? There is a simpler way for me to say this.

Words matter.

Thoughts matter.

Intention matters.

The next time you’re with someone and you share a hug, think of what you’re truly saying to that other person. Is it simply a “hello” – or is it more? We don’t need to hug everyone we meet with the same intensity or depth of emotion. But if ‘intention matters’ – then it will come across in your interactions. Always. So, if you’re not comfortable hugging people – then let them know. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s actually better to not hug someone, and be authentic, than it is to hug someone from a place of discomfort and lack of integrity.

As for my mini-pilgrimage, I continue to conjure up the myriad emotions I experienced during my time with Amma. I reflect with joy, gratitude and love for her many gifts, and I know that they will continue to unfold in my life, my soul, as I remember her embrace. Her loving, compassionate, caring embrace. What a gift.

THree THings

Body – approach your interactions with intention and authenticity.

Mind – approach your thoughts and yourself with love, kindness and compassion.

Spirit – allow your soul to experience these gifts, without parameters or strings.

In Love and Light,

Martina

(photos: Amma photo reproduced from Amma's website www.amma.org; Swan photo courtesy of Charlotte Rushton, www.charlotterushton.com)

Hugs and Handshakes

When we appreciate what we have, we spend less time focusing on what we have not.

In light of the upcoming Thanksgiving Holiday – a time to reflect with gratitude on our many blessings – I thought it best to keep this week’s entry rather simple and focused. Giving thanks is about more than focusing on that which we appreciate most in our lives. It’s also about learning to be humble and carry ourselves with grace. For it is in humility and grace that we truly learn, understand and share our gratitude with others.

Once shared, gratitude and appreciation have a way of multiplying exponentially. You see it in a smile, or a warm hug, a pat on the back or a kind handshake. These small acts of kindness are our way of giving thanks to someone in our lives that has touched us in some way. They aren’t long speeches or well-written greeting cards – but they are the seeds that grow into peace, love and joy. Simple, they may be; they are also powerful beyond measure.

So, this week when you are with your loved ones, whether near or far, pay attention to the hugs, handshakes and smiles – both the ones you give and the ones you receive. These are the gifts in our lives for which we can be most grateful. These acts of generosity of spirit are what will propel us forward in times of trouble, and comfort us in times of need. They are priceless and timeless.

With appreciation, gratitude and love,

In Love and Light,

Martina

Manifesting and Reflecting

As the days are getting shorter, the year is coming to a close, and we are entering the holiday season with Thanksgiving next week – I feel it is time to prepare ourselves.

Typically, we look back after Christmas, and then in a hurried fashion we think about the year ahead. We make our New Year’s resolutions, and we reflect on what we did (or didn’t) accomplish these past 12 months. After 5-6 weeks of holiday feasts, parties and celebrations, it’s no doubt that the focus of our attention is usually on returning to a more moderate lifestyle – complete with diets and exercise. But what if we didn’t wait until the last minute to begin our reflections and, more importantly, our manifestations for the coming year?

By waiting until after the holiday hangover begins, our manifestations have a greater chance of coming from a place of excess or, perhaps even, punishment for how we’ve spent the last few weeks in celebration. They are reactionary. Whereas, if we begin our reflections now, and allow ourselves the time to truly focus on manifesting the coming year from a place of thoughtful consideration – think of the possibilities!

Thanksgiving is typically spent with our loved ones, pausing in gratitude, as we appreciate and share our blessings and the year we have just experienced. In that process, don’t forget that you are a “loved one” as well. Remember to pause with yourself, and reflect on the blessings you have created in your own life. This reflection will bring you to your focus for your manifestations. Through honoring yourself, you honor those around you. There is no greater gift.

Therefore, in preparation for the holidays, the coming year, and the great opportunities in your future, I invite you into a space of empowerment. “Resolutions” is just a reactive word for manifestation. More importantly, however, manifestation has an added connotation of being empowering. So – what do you desire in your life? How can you focus your attention on manifesting better health, relationships and serenity? By starting now, I can almost guarantee that your holidays will be more enjoyable. Why? Because you will be approaching them from a position of love: Love for others, for your future, and mostly, for yourself.

THree THings

Body – Think of the past year and what changes you have already made – then thank yourself. Once you’ve done that, think of new modifications you would like to consider, and why? Write them down this way: What if….

Mind – Time spent in reflection is valuable, if the reflection yields opportunities for growth. (If reflection is merely an occasion to shame yourself – then I would suggest you spend as little time as possible reflecting on the past.) Time spent looking forward is valuable, if it brings with it actionable steps for change. How are you spending your time?

Spirit – Your intuition will always lead you in the “right” direction. Right does not mean “not wrong” – instead, it means “loving.” Therefore, your intuition will always lead you toward greater love – for yourself, and, eventually, others. Can you hear your intuition? Do you know how to access it without ego and judgment? It’s always there, and it always loves you. Do you know that?

In love and light,

Martina

Off the Hook

When was the last time you gave yourself a break? Is it a common occurrence? Or is it something you just wish you could do more often? The bigger question is: do you do it at all?

We’ve all grown up in a world that has become more and more technologically advanced. But these technological advances have brought with them something else: urgency. Being constantly connected in a shrinking world has sped up growth and, unfortunately, expectations.

So – what does that mean for us on a daily basis? It means that others have expectations of us that we will be available to them whenever and however they reach out. And we, in turn, have the same expectation of them. No longer is there a delay in sharing our thoughts, ideas and feelings with the rest of the world. With the advent of Facebook, Twitter and other forms of social media, we are able to announce to everyone what we are doing on a moment-by-moment basis. And, we receive these same communications from hundreds of people all around us. This ease of communication has created a sense of urgency that was previously once dominated by pony express! Think about that.

Sometimes, this urgent “need” to respond is nothing more than a reflex to react. We don’t necessarily give thought to our reactions. We just want to hit the proverbial tennis ball back into the other side of the court. And sometimes, it’s almost as if we’re stuck in a perpetual game of “beat the clock.” But, what would happen if you allowed yourself the time to respond to someone, rather than react? What would happen if you gave yourself permission to say “no” to something or someone?

Letting ourselves off the hook is one of the most challenging decisions we make. By allowing ourselves to make a different choice, and not accepting guilt or blame – we give ourselves the gift of time and space. So often when we draw boundaries (by saying “no,” for example), we feel guilty. But when we permit ourselves to hold our boundaries without guilt or blame, we are truly being supportive of our own health and wellness. Honestly, there are very few things in life that have the urgency we now commonly apply to our everyday interactions. A car accident victim arriving at the ER is an urgent situation. Your crops withering in FarmVille is not. Nor is the set of false deadlines we continually give ourselves by making endless “to do” lists. A reasonable to do list is supportive. An infinite to do list, is stress inducing.

Now, where can you cut yourself some slack? Do the kids really need homemade cupcakes for their birthday in school – or would store-bought ones suffice? And what about your lists? Have you thought about your limits, and what it means to have a reasonable to do list? Can you prioritize it differently? (And by the way, hitting your limit means you’ve already gone too far. Just a thought.)

THree THings

Body – Do you feel guilty if you skipped a day of working out, because you simply needed one morning of sleeping a little later? They’re both good for you – why should one make you feel guilty?

Mind – Lists and reminders are only effective if we use them deliberately. Tons of sticky notes eventually just become wallpaper. What could you do differently to lighten your load?

Spirit – When our mind and body are jumbled with guilt and stress from false urgency, our spirit becomes tired. It may take a while, but eventually it will begin to wear down. If you’re already feeling tired, at your core, it’s now time to make some decisions about what to change, and when, to support yourself in a healthier manner.

In love and light,

Martina

Insides and Outsides - Part 3 of 3

For the past two weeks, we’ve discussed how comparative thinking has grown within us, manifested itself and flip-flopped around. Now we have an opportunity to learn about waking up from this dream (or nightmare) and what to do when we come to the realization of the results (wreckage?) of our learned behaviors.

Once more, the story continues: Now we’re aware. We know that we have been living life on a merry-go-round, bouncing from one carousel horse to another, and sometimes a boat. We’ve tried to grab the brass ring, but somehow it always seems to be just out of grasp – either that or we’re too dizzy from all the spinning that we’re just hanging on to the horse’s pole for dear life! Either way, we know it’s time to stop, and it’s time to change. But how?

Here we are waking up to the realization that we want something different – that we want more. But how do we define “more” and “different?” For me, of those two words, “different” has played a larger role. I spent much of my young adult life working in jobs and careers that I thought I “should” be doing. I was pleasing everyone but myself. I won’t say I didn’t like the various jobs – I did. As with many of us, I did my best to make the most of everything I was doing. I made friends, established great relationships and was successful. I was doing well. All the while, though, there was a nagging inside of me that said, “there’s something else; something different.” It took family tragedy to give me my moment of pause. And though I wish the tragedy never happened, I accept it as one of the greatest gifts in my life.

When I woke up and realized I’ve been living a life based on faulty comparisons and beliefs – I knew I needed balance. For me, the key to finding balance, and removing that revolving door from my life, is to give myself the gift of space and time. You can do this in many different ways: meditation, coaching, therapy, exercise, energy work, etc. By creating a small amount of space and time in your world, in your mind, you can actually allow the real you to start to bubble up to the surface. You can start to hear yourself, your true self – your essence. And trust me, once your Spirit realizes it’s being heard, it’s hard to shut up!

Now I know many of you will say, “But I just don’t have the time!” I know. I’ve said it, too. I’ve even tried to just use my time for this type of work – and in the process, I stopped living. So, I’m not suggesting you do ALL of those things. Just one. Choose just one thing that will give you pause in your week. One thing that’s only for you – not for anybody else. If you regularly work out, but you’re doing because you “should,” and you’d really rather be at home in yoga pants with popcorn and a chick flick; well then, I wouldn’t suggest exercise as your “pause” time. Rather I would suggest something that will get you outside yourself, possibly with someone who is trained to help you do just that. We all have the time to spend an hour a week honoring who we are inside. We may have to write it into our schedules, or block it out on our calendars, but we all have the time. If you need something totally concrete, schedule an appointment with a professional: a personal trainer, a yoga instructor, or me! If you need more flexibility, then make a commitment to yourself to take a walk for one hour a week – outside, with nature. Anything will do. It’s making the commitment and keeping it that prompts this process forward. Then what?

Well, for each of us, it’s different – but the process is the same. What we find as we step onto this path of becoming (or returning to) our authentic selves is that we never really lost who we were. We have known ourselves all along. For myriad reasons, however, we have had to become like the grass in the wind – blowing constantly in any direction. We have had to be flexible enough to be trod upon, and still stand up the next day. We have had to know what it is to be cut down and keep growing. And we have had to die in order to grow again in a new season. But here’s my thought: A willow tree has all the same characteristics: strength, flexibility, growth; but it cannot be stepped on, and it is not regularly cut down as part of its growth, nor does it die with the seasons. So – why not be a willow tree instead of grass? Why not be your authentic self, deeply rooted in who you are, yet flexible enough to move with your environment?

The willow doesn’t look at the fir tree and think, “if only I could stay green all winter long like him.” (at least, I don’t think it does!) The willow tree just is. It lives its life and fulfills its purpose as itself. It may get trimmed now and then, but if you’ve ever seen a willow tree that has been allowed to just grow naturally, you’ll see what I mean. It takes care of itself, and it bends to no one and everyone at the same time.

I know it’s been a really long story of trying to impart some knowledge and wisdom – but if you remember nothing else, remember this: however you’re feeling inside, will NEVER match up with what you see someone is being outside. It’s futile to attempt to make them match up and will only bring you discomfort. And however you appear outside, there will always be someone else who is feeling discomfort in looking at you, because they are comparing how they feel to how you look. It’s what we’ve learned. And we can un-learn it. It just takes a little time, space and practice.

Be yourself, and know that you are perfect, just as you are. And if you want to make changes, then you can, and you will – when YOU want to, for you.

THree THings

Body – you are exactly as you are meant to be, at this moment in time. Love yourself.

Mind – you are learning exactly what you are meant to learn, at this moment in time. Honor yourself.

Spirit – You know everything is perfect, just as it is unfolding and happening, at this moment in time. Be yourself.

In Love and Light,

Martina